On Mother’s Day – An Honest Reflection

Ivo was born in April, so I missed my first Mother’s Day by a month. As I waddled around on early maternity leave, I remember wondering when I’d used to being called mummy. Even 8 months pregnant I didn’t feel like a mum, and I couldn’t really imagine what it would be like.

I suppose nothing really prepares you for motherhood, but I think I found it harder to get used to than most. The loss of freedom, loss of self, loss of sleep – there’s a lot of minuses in the mummy equation. Obviously the plus is your beautiful baby, but in the early days life is pretty tough. I didn’t take to it. I missed work, resented my husband’s small freedoms {going to work! drinking coffee! not having leaky breasts!}, and felt bored by the daily grind of changing nappies and feeding.

After three months of struggling, we agreed I could have help two days a week, and I found our lovely nanny. This made a huge difference. For the first month, I didn’t really leave them for more than two hours before popping back in for a cuddle, but I felt a massive load had been lifted from my shoulders.

{Picture Credits} Caught the Light

During my time off, I’d write my blogs, and I just about managed to cover the cost of our nanny with the income earned from advertising and sponsored posts.

Gradually Ivo grew up, and become more interactive and started sleeping through the night, so things got better. But the main thing that changed was my attitude. I started to accept my new job as Ivo’s mother. We’ve now got two little boys – Arthur is seven months – and although the last six months have been hard, I’m happy {and proud} to be called their mummy.

P.S. These gorgeous portraits were taken by the incredibly lovely Chloé Browne from Caught the Light. She used film, which gives the pictures a luminosity that you don’t get from digital. Do get in touch with her if you’re looking for baby pictures or family portraits – she’s brilliant!

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 Introducing Arthur

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